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Showing posts from 2014

A Very Merry Christmas

It has been almost a month since I last posted. I was being all thankful during the month of November and now I find myself 4 days from Christmas and I am again feeling thankful. Thankful for my friends and family, thankful for my home and my cat, thankful for everything. I have fallen off the training wagon until about a week ago, and fallen off the healthy wagon months ago. I guess I have fallen off the blogging wagon too. This is where I acknowledge that I am going to take a break from blogging until after the new year. I wish you all the most delightful Christmas!!!

People First

I was blessed with participating in meaningful volunteer opportunities at a young age. It all started with confirmation hours in eighth grade... I went on every trip to the soup kitchen and the Christmas wrapping days, I also signed up to help people with disabilities participate in recreational activities. And so began my first lesson on people first language. Perhaps you have heard of it? It is that whole idea that when you are introducing or talking about a person, you should always address them by name first. So for instance, if I were talking about my favorite TV show, and I wanted to talk about Max and his disability, I would introduce the topic by saying something like: Max, the boy with asperger, NOT: the asberger boy Max. This language has become so common to me, even writing the second statement makes me extremely uncomfortable. So, I was having a discussion about how people hang flags in front of their houses, or put bumper stickers or messages on the back of their cars. We

Transforming Your Fears

I never realize how truly lucky I am until something very small happens and it sheds light on everything. One of the scariest symptoms I have with this thing called MS is my choking from time to time because I can't swallow properly. I remember the first time it happened and it really scared me. It was the final day of my jury duty for a murder trial, it was my birthday and also the day before Thanksgiving. It was about 8 years ago, actually. The story goes as this, I was driving home from Jury Duty. I was in a crummy neighborhood on the southside of Chicago and I was eating a snack. The courthouse was not known for providing good food during lunch, nor was it known for its safe surroundings. Anyway, it was a cold rainy night, I was snacking on something and all of a sudden I was gagging on my food for some unknown reason. I wasn't known to carry my cell phone all the time back then, and my mind went to the worst place. I was going to choke and pass out at a stop light, someone

Final Thankfuls

And here is my final thankfuls for November. Thanks for sticking with me through the month of thankfuls! November 23: Mexican Food - To celebrate one of my friend's birthdays, I met her and her husband at the most delicious Mexican restaurant I have been to. I'll certainly be going to that restaurant again. November 24: Walgreen's - In a pinch Walgreen's is there for last minute photos and medicine. Walgreen's saved the day while making a birthday gift! November 25: Birthday Dinners - I have several friends who have birthdays the same week as me. For the past few years, three of us celebrate our dinner together. You know what I like about birthday dinners? Time with my friends and dessert! November 26: My friends - This was one of my friend's birthdays. Singing happy birthday to my friend reminded me that friends are really awesome. They celebrate you because they want to, and I got to celebrate my friend because I wanted to... November 27: Turkey Tro

Thankfuls

Week three of my thankfuls makes me realize that there are so many things in this world that make me happy. Here's this weeks list. If your looking for more of an athletic blog post this week, you should hop on over to my MS blog for the week. Otherwise, read my thankfuls here... November 16: Organized Closets - My friend came over and helped me organize a closet last Sunday. After organizing we went walking through antique malls. It was such a fun day and now I have the most organized guest room closet I've ever seen. November 17: New Colleagues - I got a new colleague this week who is awesome. I'm looking forward to working with her and maybe practice my exercise bully skills. We will see... November 18: Doctors - I'm pretty sure this has been on my list for the last couple of weeks, but here is the thing... My medical team rocks! From the mind to the body, the people who support me medically are committed to my overall health, for that I am thankful. Novemb

Excuses

When you are diagnosed with anything, from bursitis to dehydration to multiple sclerosis, the people who love you become experts on your disease. They know the most advanced treatments, the best doctors, all the symptoms of your disease, etc. The one thing they are not an expert on are the inner workings of your brain, unless you let them in. I have a friend who knows what makes me tick, and as much as I want to use multiple sclerosis as my excuse for things, she simply doesn't let me. As a matter of fact, if I even mention MS as an excuse, she calls me out on it and tells me to get over it. She is kinder than that, most of the time... Anyway, one of my proudest achievements in life have been all of my athletic pursuits. I cross start lines and finish lines, I celebrate, hug my friends and spend some time celebrating. I have other interests that are of similar importance like my vegetable gardens, music and my craftiness. Although these other interests make me extremely happy, ther

More Thankfuls

Sometimes it can be difficult to recognize what I am thankful for, especially when I am encountered with challenges. Take for instance being covered in stain, and having it splattered all over your laundry room... Or dropping your keys in a public toilet before having a chance to flush. It is a very good exercise to do thankfuls when I am having a particularly challenging week. Thankfuls may be difficult to identify when in flux, but they can improve your mindset. November 9: Kid Dates - I've been promising my friend's son, for a few months, that I would take him to Chuck E Cheese. Last Sunday, I picked him up and introduced him to the wonderful world of tokens, mediocre pizza and tickets. We had such a great time playing ski ball and every other game in that establishment. November 10: Resiliency - As I mentioned earlier, I've had quite the week with computer outages, stain flying around my house, and keys in the toilet. Here's the thing... I've gotten to the

November Thankfuls

 My friend pointed out that the thankful trend has not taken over facebook this November. We both have different opinions on people's propensity to identify the things they are thankful for during this month. I for one, love it. my friend argues that people should be thankful all year round and not just talk about it in November. I on the other hand, know that people are thankful all year round, and November is a special month that gives people permission to shout their thankfuls from the rooftops. What is wrong with that? In my opinion, it is sweet... So, I'll plan to be thankful every Sunday this month, since it is HIGHLY unlikely that I will make the time to post twice a week. Here we go. I think what I'll do is post a thankful for every day of the previous week... With a little story about each thankful... November 1: Organized basements - I have a good story about friends who came over to organize my life. My basement is now an enjoyable space for me. November 2

The Medicine Debate

It is so hard to rationalize taking medication for something that you don't necessarily see immediate results. People with a disease the progresses over time may understand what I am talking about. Here's the thing... Although I am an expert on my body, I am not an expert on the autoimmune disease that lurks within my body. Who is the expert then? Well my medical team... My initial conundrum with medication was that I have never wanted to be dependent on something... But there are very real and rational reasons why dependence on medicine is important. Take a diabetic for instance. Taking insulin is necessary or risk death. Taking disease modifying medication is necessary or risk faster progression. The same can be said for so many diseases... So, I currently take seven prescriptions and two high dose vitamins on a daily basis. I would be lying if I said I didn't struggle with taking so many pills and shots every day. In fact, I would be lying if I said I was a perfect medic

Experiences Vs. Transactions

*** Originally posted on February 5, 2012. Read on if you wish... A few notes, since this post was made, my Dukie man has passed away, but I still stand by the fact that an experience is much more fulfilling than a transaction.*** I was having a very interesting/enlightening conversation with one of my friends this week about the difference between an experience and a transaction. Every time someone calls me on the phone I have a choice to answer or not. I most frequently answer the phone because I am an extrovert and love talking to people, but on occasion I will pass up the phone call from a friend because I do not have the energy or time to give the phone call the attention it deserves. Similarly, when I take my dog for a walk I leave the house free of technology because it is my pup's time to experience the world and I feel the only way I can be attentive to his sniffing needs is by paying attention to his experience. What I have noticed on these walks is that he interac

The Great Escape

I have some friends who are data people. I get it, but I don't thrive on it. Over the past several weeks, maybe even month, I have been running and cycling sans a gps device. I have absolutely no clue how many miles have been logged, although I could figure it out if I wanted to. The thing is, it has been nice.  I'm sure you have all had a bad day. What is the first thing you do when you have a bad day? My guess is you do exactly what I do... Wish it away. Thing is, you can't wish away a bad day, you have to get through it and NOT over it. The best way to cope with anything is to face it head on. Well sometimes an escape is just as nice. So how do these two topics merge together? Well, my friend and I were talking about all of the runners in this world and why they run. I stated that they are escaping. I do want to mention that there is a VERY big difference between 'running from' and 'escaping'. By escaping, I really mean taking a break. Running fro

The Power of We

My team of WE (not including my parents) Today was an interesting day. I went into it begrudgingly because I had to do something I didn't wan t to do, but I gave myself an attitude adjustment on the way, which gave me permission to take a step back to learn something new. There are so many thoughts and discoveries to process from today, but I'm going to focus on the one thing that is freshest on the mind at this ripe hour of 10:00 pm. I should first mention that this discovery came while watching the last two episodes of Parenthood this evening at my friend's house. TV is one of those phenomenons in life that has increasingly taken over simple evening chatter with friends, that perhaps used to be focused on the happenings of the day. Call this escapism, or what you will, but know that sometimes the biggest lessons come from those escapes. If you have been following along this blog for the past couple of weeks, you likely know that I am in my month of no MS. I have been 90%

VolunCHEER!!!

Whoops, missed a week... When I went up to Canada to run the Niagara Falls Woman's Half Marathon, I was embarking on a whole new experience. It included crossing a border, eating out all meals for several days before the race, the metric system on the course, and the most robust race packet I have ever seen. Here's the funny story that has never been told. All the volunteer shirts said voluncheer. I thought it Remember this finisher's photo? was one of two things: a) the screen printers screwed up, or; b) the Canadians had some weird way of saying volunteer. I mean either could have been possible, right? Well, I believe it was while we were running this lovely half marathon that I finally asked Sue if that spelling was french or something, because it occupied my brain so much that I needed to know!!! She then, so kindly (or not), laughed and told me it said volunCHEER!!! It was a play on words, who knew? Fast forward to this October, and I saw the 2014 Col

The Elephant

I'm in the sixth day of this little game I play with myself sometimes called MS Free time. What might MS free time entail? It is just a period of time in which I stop all talk about MS, and resume my life as if I was never diagnosed. Simply put, I just quiet my loquacious nature for a bit. I don't totally ignore MS though... I still take my meds. Oh, and I had a brief conversation with my mom about it today, but that was less about my MS and more about emotions surrounding chronic diseases. I have successfully gone MS free on several occasions, one of which was my trip to Canada in the beginning of the summer. So why am I blogging about it then? Because, as my mom said today, I don't know how to quiet my mind. My friend and I talk about my inability to relax, I disagree and was telling my mom I am great at relaxing, which is true, but only physically. I mean I can ignore dishes in my sink and the ring around my bathtub for weeks out of my 'need' to relax, but my min

A Lesson for the Friends

What do you do during your 'off season'? Well let's first define what an off season is for me... In my world, any time I am not registered for a big event, or the event I am registered for is more than 20 or so weeks away, I call it off season. One of my favorite things to do when I am not training for something is, well, nothing. The last big event of 2014 is over. Pedal to the Point ended two months ago today. I'm still mourning the completion of the best event of the year, and certainly the most memorable of my life. Finishing Pedal to the Point was something!!! No other word can explain it... So this is where I get to the point, and really explain what I do in my off season. I have post event depression, I watch copious amounts of TV, eat copious amounts of ice cream, lay on the couch, and do crazy household projects... I am often told that I am not good at living in the moment, but I can tell you when you are on episode 23 of Sister Wives, finished a se

If You Can't Beat Em, Join Em

Susan, Me and Sue - Pre Race I am a person who likes to have plans. I typically choose an event and beg Sue to join me. This time? Sue chose an event, mentioned it and I said OK. I also dragged another friend into this race. This weekend was all about OSU. Now, I went to the University of Colorado at Boulder. I wouldn't say that I was a huge football fan, actually my friend and I were talking about the fact that I was more annoyed by football because the traffic made getting to the mountains difficult... But I am a loyal lover of the Buffs, from affiliation alone. So when Sue asked me if I would do this race with her, my natural answer was yes, but that was more because she wanted to do the race, and less because I got to cross the finish line on the fifty yard line. So, yesterday, Sue and I were heading out to get our packets, and I expressed to her, that I wanted to be like the Amish this weekend. What does that mean? I just wanted to fit in with the crowd (the Amish do

The Fear of Loss

I have been told that I don't know how to live in the moment because I am always making plans for the next moment. I like to argue that I am good at living in the moment, except when I am planning for what comes next. What is the difference? I don't know... Do you live with your cup half empty or half full? Same thing, right? Well, I'm learning that I am somewhat wrong. I still stand by the fact that I live in the moment, afterall, I will stop to appreciate the snowfall, stars in the sky, the most recent household accomplishment, but that is between planning away my life. When you have MS, there is this underlying knowledge that you may someday be disabled, thus a fear may develop. Is it rational? Some may argue that it isn't rational, afterall, I can walk out the door on any given morning and get struck by a bus, or fall and break my back, thus resulting in the exact same affliction of MS, potential paralysis. The difference between these circumstances is that when you

Please Hold

I'm missing Pedal 2 the Point... What a brilliant weekend that I got to experience with all of the people I love. I most recently had a run which I didn't drag my leg at all, until after the run! Thank goodness for the cooler weather. I have so much to share, but need a break this week. Please hold until I come back next week...

Keep Trecking

Ever hear the quote, "A body in motion, stays in motion?" I live by that these days. My friend Sue and I were running on Sunday, while we were running, we were having a conversation about my gait, and how it changes step by step through a run. My first step may be strong with both legs fully engaged, and my final step, my left leg can be fully disengaged and dragging behind me. I have come to accept that my body is the perfect specimen for Newton's Law of Motion. One of the things I am learning from reading various threads in on-line MS support groups is that people who have stayed active over the years after being diagnosed with MS, are still active. Their activities may have changed, and in some cases change day to day, but ultimately, they are able to maintain some semblance of activity. I am now convinced that I need to keep this body of mine in motion. Here is where Newton's Law really comes into play for me. Although Newton's law states that an object will r

This Random Life

I'm lost for fodder this week. So I'm going to go with a random post. Random events from a random week? That sounds like fun, right? Piper I have this little friend named Piper/Pipes/Piper bug/Piper Diaper, and she is my cat. I love my cat!!! Piper keeps life interesting. Between her interest in taking showers and playing fetch with paper or socks or hats or bras, she has picked up a new hobby this week. Want to know what this hobby is? She drags clothes around my house. Yesterday, I went to celebrate a friend's wedding. Before that, I was out riding with my friend Sue. To say my Piper Bug was a little neglected for the day would be an understatement. Anyway, I got home from the day and clothes were strewn all over my living room. At first I thought my house was ransacked and someone had stolen all of my worldly possessions, but my computer was sitting right on my chair, and so were my running shoes, so I knew it wasn't that. I then walked down to my basement and

Lessons from the Kids

The Tree House! I spent the week at my sister's house, and pre-dinner they either say a prayer, say itadakimasu or do gratefuls. I particularly enjoyed the gratefuls because I got to hear about the things that really interest my niece and nephews, it also gave me the opportunity to let them know how much I enjoyed my time with them. It was an interesting week because two of the kiddos learned that I have Multiple Sclerosis, and the other one learned that I take a shot every day. My oldest nephew asked a couple of questions, but didn't really show much interest, and my other nephew asked a bunch of questions and then moved on with the activity for the day. My niece was really only interested because she saw the pile of pills and the shot I take every day laying around the house, without any regard, on my part, to hide it. You see, they are all old enough to know they shouldn't touch pills, and so I could leave them around and talk about them from time to time. So why is this

Imperfection

An old friend lived by the quote: 'Try again, fail again, fail better.' I like it! My sister and I were working on my nephew's tree house this morning, before I made the trek back to Ohio. She got to experience with me, what my friend Sue puts up with when I help her with house projects, failure the first time, success the third time... The beauty of the process is, once you figure out your mistake the first time, the second time it is much easier. Unfortunately, I had to leave before the second time. I got home to Ohio, and was smacked in the face with incompetence and a bored cat. My cat is currently laying across my back, holding me down, so I have to lay here while typing. I'm OK with that... But I am practicing extreme patience at this fine hour of 10:44 pm, Sunday evening. I've never been so glad that I have the day after vacation off from work. Tomorrow, I plan to try again. Many things went wrong today, but many things went right too. For instance

A Different Kind of Blog

With my awesome MS supporters at Pedal to the Point, a ride of BikeMS.  I am an eternal optimist, and 90% happy. We all have moments of sadness, and some of us even bouts of depression; how you deal with your situation defines you as a person, in my opinion. One of the saddest things I have seen over the past year, since I have been diagnosed with MS is how people deal with this disease. I by no means have any right to judge another person's journey, but I can reflect on other peoples' journey and decide whether I want to apply some of their lessons, wisdom, statements, etc. to me. One of my friends listened to me cry for about two hours last night. You see, I am a runner and it was too hot to run. What I didn't tell my friend is that I had significant physical challenges throughout the day, and didn't have any business running last night anyway. But the tears were all influenced by things that really don't matter when all is said and done! Or do they? I mean I crie

The Journey

These moments, make every journey worth it! Have you ever had a moment in which you overreacted, and when you reflect on it, you realize it is triggered by something that happened years ago, but in the moment of your overreaction you take it out on the WRONG person? Yeah, I had one of those moments today, and man did it drive me all sorts of crazy. When I start reflecting on my new goal events, right now it is Glass City Half Marathon, I wonder how in god's name am I going to be able to run 13.1 miles again? It is interesting that, right now, my mind reverts to those runs that have challenged my core recently, but not to the finish line of the marathon I ran, or the half iron man I participated in. This is something I need to work on. The reality is, every time you create a goal for yourself, there are different factors that will likely influence the outcome, whether you want to admit it or not. Reflecting on the fact that I completed a full marathon may not even be appr

P2P Pictures

I'm still processing the Pedal 2 the Point ride. I honestly still can't believe we did that ride. It is surreal that so many people came together to ride with me. All of my siblings, two of their spouses, one of their uncles and two friends made the trek to Ohio. I have story after story from the weekend, but I have no way to adequately share the stories... Quite honestly, I lived in fear of doing a big bike ride like this. I've always wanted to do a ride like this, but never had the right motivation. Overnight rides take so much training and willingness to sleep in an odd place between days. Also, the people you spend the days with is extremely important. It is like traveling. There are VERY few people who I would travel with, and this crowd is certainly on my travel list forever now. Rather than tell the stories that I hold so dear, I have put together one memory that I want to keep with me, along with a picture of two of each person I rode with. These brief notes fr